More like PensHURTS

Right now you’re feeling as excited as I was to stumble upon this sign. B-B-B-B-BAM! Damn! It’s like a FIVE HIT COMBO to your GROIN!

WHACK – Alan Williams!

SOCK – Alan Williams’ name in its original katakana!

BIFF – He has a KARATE centre!

THWACK – Tae Kwon Do too!

OOF – the official Alan Williams dojo logo featuring the official fist of ALAN WILLIAMS.

Now you’re stumbling around, numb from the waist down, and all you can think about is HOW DO I GET DOWN THOSE STAIRS AND SIGN UP?

Well sadly, there are no stairs. At all. There is no dojo, nor is there an Alan Williams. Maybe there never was. The only people who would ever see this sign are those heading to the TAB at the end of this bizarre corridor, so maybe downstairs is some kind of veiled reference to hell.