To many, Yagoona is just that ugly place you never stop at as you head along the Hume, but to some, it’s home. To Helen, it’s the site of her magnificent Pavlova Palace. Oh, sorry, pavalova.

I wonder if this makes it harder to find her in the Yellow Pages?

Not the Helen, mind: A Helen, and one could safely speculate, one of the many Helens who ran the preceding Pav(a)lova Pantry. What am I talking about, you ask as you’ve asked so many times before? Look again:

Yes, from the sign it’s clear that a cabal of Helens ran this secret, masonic (Hellenic?) society that provided a pantry-full of pavlova to the people of Yagoona. What caused the Pantry’s perestroika is unknown, but after the purge only one Helen was left standing. Perhaps her designation as a Helen is her way of paying tribute to those whose blood, sweat and tears went into building not just a pantry…but a palace. Or maybe she just loves using the letter ‘a’. In fact thinking about it now, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was supposed to be called Pavlova Place, and her name’s actually Helena.